Jenny Eclair, «Older and wider: A Survivor's Guide to the Menopause»: We only get one go at life, and considering the menopause can drag on for a decade of your allotted time on this planet (plus an extra couple of years for the peri-menopause) it would be a shame to waste that time by being permanently down. So, with that in mind, let's put a positive spin on the menopause - the most important things to remember are: 1. It's not going to kill you. The menopause can be upsetting and inconvenient, but it's not going to put you in a hospital ward for months on end. There is nothing about the menopause that should cause any real chronic physical pain, so if that's what you're feeling, get down to your doctors ASAP; don't blame every ache and health niggle on the menopause - there might be other stuff going on, so get it seen to. 2. It's not going to last for ever. In fact, if you decide to take medication, you may barely even notice it's happening. Some days will be easier than others, but there is nothing about the menopause that should leave you with any long-term damage. Possibly the biggest hormone-related worry is osteoporosis (brittle-bone disease, leading to fractures) and any woman who has a history of this condition in the family should take all the precautions she can to prevent it. 3. You are still young. Old age is far more fraught with danger than our middle years. As my mother says, 'Being ninety isn't for cissies'. But let's get through this bit first! What we all want is to live well through the menopause, not to fall out with the people we love and have as much fun as we can cope with, but still be in bed by 11pm. (Who am I trying to kid? Most nights I'm up those stairs on the dot of ten.) To be honest, I have quite a low threshold for 'fun', but I do like to enjoy myself. It's just I enjoy myself differently these days. The other evening our young neighbours had a party that spilled out into the garden and eventually wound up at around 8am. It was approaching 9am by the time the last bodies had crawled indoors. Meanwhile, next door, I was up and dressed and coming downstairs for breakfast, and as time passed, I could feel how shit they were feeling through the walls - their hangovers were almost forming damp patches and no one on their side of the wall stirred for the entire day. I, on the other hand, did some yoga, a line of tapestry (the new cocaine), smashed a boiled egg on to some avo toast and went out to see the Van Gogh exhibition at the Tate Britain. Now that's what I call having a good time. One of the most interesting revelations about the menopause is that, for many of us women, it's a time of discovering who we really are, what we really like and what we really can't be bothered with. By the time you are menopausal, a lot of life stuff may have already slotted into place. If you're going to have babies and a career, then you will probably have already gone down that road, although, as we all know, careers are something you can change at any time of life. But what I'm trying to say is that for the majority of women, by the time we stop ovulating we will have reached a stage in our lives when we more or less know who we are. As a younger woman I spent so much time competing and trying to be a more exciting version of myself that I often lost sight of who I was. One of the perks of the menopause is that you finally come to terms with the kind of woman you are, and if there's anything you don't like about yourself, then you'd better deal with it pronto. Or don't. It can only be up to you. #книги