But maybe the thing that is haunting you isn't that you actually get to live just one life rather than more... but whether you're choosing the 'best' life?

That's something that I've shifted my mindset on.

I've realized that the life that i've chosen for myself might not be the grandest and I might not have pushed myself to the furthest reaches of my talent or imagination...

Maybe I do not have what other people perceive as a huge life that is dazzling and dramatic and and good every single aspect of it is fixed. Relationships? Check! Children? Check! Health, housing, finances, career... That's a lot. Tt's just a lot of boxes to check.

Thinking about the life that I am experiencing now and the one that I hope I will experience in the future, I can't really honestly say objectively that it is the 'best' life. But it is my particular favorite.

I'm attached to my life! I like the people in it. They happen to be cool.

I like the clothes that i wear, they don't they may not be 'objectively' the best clothes made out of the best fabric from the best designers that flatter me the most... but they are my particular favorites.

I think there is a room to indulge in in being partial to something rather than having to claim that it is 'the best'. I absolutely bloody love my friends. Especially ones that are really close to me, they are incredible people!

Now would i swear that they have impeccable moral standing in under any kind of pressure or that their talent is superior to anybody else's on earth?

No, no, no, I wouldn't.

But they are my particular favorite people and I am attached to them in the same way that when you have a kid, you're like amazed when they learn to walk even though you know that most kids do eventually learn to walk.

I am really excited when my friends achieve something or make a good joke or wear a good outfit. Because i like them! They are my particular favorites and i like to see them succeed in small and big ways.

I think that can be the same for your life.

However, I will also give you my first reaction when i read this question. Which is...

— How do you become okay with only living one life?

— BOOKS!

That's what books are for. That's why i love them that's why i used to want to be an actress. That's why I like imagining what it's like to be other people rather than imagining myself as other people.

I think the creative energy that you have is probably a little bit misplaced and it's more fun to just imagine being other people rather than worrying about the directory of your life.

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